Second Guessing

Second Guessing, that is the money monster that rears its ugly head after an appointment goes in the direction of no deal. 

What did I say? 

What did I not say? 

Was the information I shared pertinent, and what about that joke, did that offend? 

Second guessing can preoccupy, and steal the energy required to go out there and see next. How about this for slaying the monster: THEY missed out. 

YOU, know what it takes to provide exceptional service.

YOU, have done your homework, your due diligence. 

That could have been a client no deal last person you saw, just DIDN'T see the opportunity in front of them, when you were right there. 

Blinders, we all wear them. We have tainted vision, blurred vision, temporary blindness, and I'm here to suggest to you, Take a look at Second Guessing. 

What form of myopia would this monster have you suffer? Slay this monster with your new perfect vision ~ review what you need to learn from the last no go, and second guess no more, because next is waiting for you, and they have 20/20 vision with a complimentary yes on their lips. 

Go get em Tiger. 

What's in it for me?

There is a money monster that lurks, murmuring what's in it for me...what do I get out of this thing, this contribution I am making? With shifty eyes, what's in it for me looks around and sees what others have and wants wants whispering that should be minnnnneeee.  This is one of the most dangerous money monsters. Given space and time to breathe and speak, it breeds contempt, jealousy and a self indulgence that destroys character and trust in relationships. This is the dangerous part, the broken trust in relationship. What's in it for me has a posture, a way of positioning and maneuvering to get what is owed to it and giving way to the insidiousness of entitlement, another natural monster bred cousin. When what's in it for me shows up, everyone can smell it's odoriferous scent and backing away is the only self protective mechanism available to the would be offended victim if they were to stay...what's in it for me is offensive and must be stopped by checking in with the questions: what do I want, what am I willing to do to get it and lastly, who do I want to be in relationship with others? Letting what's in it for me speak is a mistake, eradicate him by going out immediately and doing something kind for someone who could NEVER possibly pay you back! 

Dark Doubt

What makes you think you can do this thing, this, thinng you think is so immmportant, so. ... valuabbbble ... hissssss. 

You aren't good enough. 

You are so arrogant, thinking you are special, different, unique. Give up! 

Mediocre is waiting for you. YA DON'T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES. 

Take a look around you, what do you sssseee? You are NOTHING, compared to those successsssful people you so want to be just like.

Want to be, want to be like ... wanna be ... you are a wannnnbe. That's allll you are, hissssssss, a wannabe. 

Can you hear the whisper of doubt, dragging out words, planting insecurity and condemnation, with the taint of contempt? This is the Dark Doubt that threatens to shroud the soul, bury talent, hope, possibility, under the blanket of you cannnnnt doooo that. 

Doubt threatens to steal vitality and strength, the drive and passion required to actualize what the heart and mind, conceive as important and possible. The voice of Dark Doubt gets loud and proud in its assaults, as you move toward your goals, your dreams. 

This blog is about slaying the money monster that rears its ugly head in your mind, in your pysche. You have a dream, and a purpose, and payment is the reward for your work. Don't allow Dark Doubt to be the loudest, hissing voice in your head. 

What do you need to hear about who you are, and how important your work really is? Once you have spent some time in self-discovery, let the words in your head, your heart and soul, be your repeated refrain. Something like this:

I am amazing at what I do

I am a game changer

I make a difference in the lives of others

I don't stop; I keep on going

My life and work have meaning and purpose

I believe my services are what people need

I matter, and so does the work I am called to

Dark Doubt, be damned. I will serve and be glad for the opportunities. 

Cart before the horse

Putting the cart before the horse. An image of new entrepreneurs has come to me in the form of a huge empty wooden cart just waiting to be filled with money and when a prospective client is met, the empty cart gets shoved at the prospect, sometimes knocking them over and leaving wheel marks. The horse, or entrepreneur in this instance, is peaking over top the cart trying to get a glimpse of whether or not the potential client, is willing to help fill up that empty cart, and in desperation, gives it one more hearty shove. Not only has it run over the PC (potential client/prospect), it has run over all the people in its wake, and many are running as fast as they can, to get AWAY from that crazy empty money cart, and the horse that's out of control with all that pushing. 

This leads me to the big questions: What is your business, What is your work? In the natural order, horses pull carts, they don't push them. The horse is symbolic of servant, the empty cart is meant to be filled, and might I suggest the filling is for the client, NOT for the horse? 

First things first, you serve, client benefits, than you get paid. What is your business, your work? Whom do you serve? The monster desperation would have you serve yourself, your own pockets and bank account, I say nay nay, serve the client first and money will fill your cart soon enough. 

No

No and asking for the sale. You don't get if you don't ask and if you are not asking, how come? I read some statistics in a book recently about asking and hearing the response no. The stats are a little dated because they come from Jack Canfield's book The Success Principles, and I am using them for illustration purposes only.

Here they are:  44% of all salespeople quit trying after the first call
                         24% quit after the second call
                         14% quit after the third call
                         12% quit after the fourth call
                         60% OF ALL SALES HAPPEN AFTER THE FOURTH CALL

Perhaps you are a parent and have given the answer no to a child's request, only to discover in dismay that with some pestering, you have said yes, and suddenly you are giving them what you didn't think was a good idea in the first place. The stats above are a representation of the pay off for persistence and tenacity. 

If you aren't asking for a sale, what is stopping you? Fear of rejection? It takes a lot of no's to get to a yes, so we have the no monster covered here if you are willing to ask, ask, ask at least five times. Next is this. Do you believe in your offering? Will what your are selling in product or services benefit the one who pays for it/them? Do YOU spend money on what you are selling? 

I love what I do and I'm not afraid to tell people about it, because I know that when clients part with their money, it is for their benefit, they are the ones that reap the reward for hiring me to serve them. Believe in your offering, ask until you get a yes and tell the money monster no when that's not the answer you are looking for, and keep on asking. 

May you live long and prosper.

Sales

Sales. How do you make your money? If there is an exchange of cash for product, and this is how you get paid, than you are in sales. If there is an exchange of cash for services, and this is how you get paid, then guess what? You are in sales. The whole world works this way and regardless of job title or description, if no one wants what you've got, you won't be able to get some of the coloured paper in your pocket that you want so badly. Which brings me to the ask. How do you know no one wants what you are selling? How can you be confident that the service you provide isn't something people will part with their money to have? Have you asked? How many people have you spoken to and asked if they want what you have to offer? The money monster don't ask suggests that by asking, you are putting yourself and the one you are asking in an awkward and untenable position. Don't ask ensures that yes, an untenable situation is gaurenteed, because if you don't ask, you don't get and neither does the person who could benefit significantly from your product or service or better yet, from knowing someone like you that is reliable and trustworthy that they can refer to friends and family. Consider this: if you don't ask, someone else will and the answer to the question could very well be YES...to the person who took a step in faith and ignored the money monster don't ask. Ask and yea shall receive, keep asking and you have formed a habit and you will get used to the word yes, ringing in your ears. 

Mercenary

Mercenary is the money monster that I have seen lurking in the shadows of the professionals mind. A mercenary is a for profit oriented person, someone who historically is willing to kill for money, including his own countrymen. This monster whispers to the service mind and hearted "what kind of human being are you? If you really believe in helping people, you should work for free". The serving heart gets twisted into a ball of conflict and the topic of a money exchange for services rendered becomes taboo, a don't go there zone, even when the client brings the subject up. Without resolution to this conflict, multiple side effects and co-lateral damage can occur. For the service providing professional, there may be the question of worth, as in, are my services worthy of payment? There is also the risk of arrogance and claiming of accomplishment for the clients forward movement and advancement with a building up of resentment residue for said client for not appreciating "all I have sacrificed and done for you"...over time, the professional may devalue themselves, their clients and ultimately, their profession as a not so great business endeavour. There is an old adage "services rendered without payment are not valued" and herein lies the risk for the client, regardless of their progression inside of the relationship, they may feel as though what they got was second rate because it was free. This is NOT the case with all clients~I have done pro bono work that has been greatly appreciated (it is better that the offer comes from the professional and is not a suggestion on the clients part...some people are so fantastic that working with them and seeing them expand and grow is payment enough). The second feeling that may come between client and professional is one of indebtedness, a power in-balance between the two. This unhealthy growth like development can have lasting effects and diminishes both members in the relationship with emotionally strained entanglements. Lastly, it is the profession that suffers the most...when I hire someone, they get paid for their expertise, their learned skills and experience, and my trust in them being well place to deliver the goods or services I am paying for. When I am hired, it is with the understanding that my efforts to provide services will be valued by the client and there is an upfront agreement that there will be an exchange of money for service. At the root of it all is beliefs...do I believe that those who hire me will get what they came for and will be willing to pay for it? Is this mercenary? Absolutely not, "money is a measure of how hard I have worked" stated Zig Ziglar...putting heart and soul into the work makes it even more valuable. Know your business, know your value added to the lives of others and stop giving away the cow with the milk. Kill mercenary in his lying tracks. 

More Flip Yo

More flip yo... these are the words a client used to describe abundance. I loved this phrase when I heard it: it was my clients playful way of saying he wants more money. 

You have a money story, and you just may not know it yet because it has never been pointed out to you, and here I am telling you that yes you do, you have one. The story may not be really yours though, and that's the other point, your story must be your own, written by your hand otherwise what you want and what you get WILL be too different things. 

I will give you my personal example of how this all works using money and electricity as an example. While growing up, my parents flogged my sisters and I with guilt whenever we failed to turn off a light when leaving a room because "electricity costs money you know" and "money doesn't grow on trees." I laugh as I write this because my husband has entered an end of the day darkened room with me squinting and he has said "what are you doing in the dark, why don't you turn the light on?"...seems so reasonable, doesn't it? 

Unwittingly, my bat behaviour was inherited and I had to have someone else switch the metaphorical lights on for me to see in my darkness. What else did I inherit for goodness sakes? 

The money monster old story wants you to be stuck with what USED to work for someone else and he really would like to keep you in your own dark cell of wanting without knowing how to satisfy the want. If abundance is your intention, you must think and feel into abundance, using language that matches and attracts what it is you believe abundance to be. Here in lies your opportunity to sit and create your new money story... 

• Abundance means_________________
• Abundance feels like_______________________
• I know I am experiencing abundance when______________________ 

Write your own story, with characters, a story line, descriptive scenes and experiences, and YOU as the hero in the story. Cut out the old story from your life, and create your abundance in every way shape and form imaginable. 

Words become things, intention sets tone and undertone, awareness takes you where you want to go.

Loosey Goosey

Time in equals money out, as in if I put the time into something, there will be a financial reward for my efforts. This is a misunderstood concept and the money monster Loosey Goosey capitalizes on the lack of clarity in the message and can keep a person chasing their tail feathers for the duration, in other words, for life. I will give you an example: I want to maintain my weight with the ultimate goal being health and wellness. I decide that I will exercise and eat well, this requires me to be intentional and consciencious with my choices. The questions that must be asked are: what do I want, what do I need to do, how will I know I have it, in other words, how will I measure outcomes? Time in: 27 minutes cardio, 300 calories burned, done. Next step, breakfast, time in approximately 15 minute, 2 eggs, 1 tbsp olive oil, 1 slice toast, 340 calories consumed, done. In this simple equation, I am already off track with my time in and calories out being skewed, an imbalance and the beginning of distortion has started. If this continues, I will not maintain my weight, I will gain weight and at a rate commensurate with my rather rapid consumption of easily eaten foods. Here is what I am driving at~wellness is no accident and neither is wealth. If you don't know how to get fit or make money, check out the experts in your given field and how they have achieved mastery. So here we go, let's wade into the deep waters of learning together...being a student of a master is important, with watching and skill acquisition as the goal, mimicry is an initial step toward honing the admirable skills. Mimicry, however, can become the tail that wags the proverbial dog and the money monster loosey goosey would have the student persue excellence outside of self perennially, meaning taking course upon course and looking for a magic bullet and never really leaving the shallow end of the pool. Investment in mastery may seem expensive at first AND well worth the effort, just as 27 minutes invested in cardiovascular exercise is slightly uncomfortable and ultimately rewarding, the payoff far outweighs the effort. What is difficult and breathtaking at the outset eventually becomes comfortable with ease, as novice becomes masterful. I must, you must, know, be conscious of...everything, yes everything you say and want, and what you are willing to do to have it. Kill loosey goosey and grab hold of self awareness, let it be your master.